Mettlesome

what's up.


If you know me, yeah you'll obviously know I'm a freaking shy person.

Always wanted to be a braver person. A more sporting person. I want, I really want to. I tried so hard, but I don't know why on Earth I can't just make the first step on being one. My first step always made me a worry rat. Often afraid if I will humilate myself. Afraid of losing my face. I often persuade myself to be braver, but it always ended up in failure.

To be honest people like that makes me get annoyed and irritated. Yup I get irritated by myself too. I really hate myself for being this way. I have no doubt that people will definitely hate pussies, cause even I myself hate it. But whenever I'm with a more timid person, I don't know what's wrong but eventually I'll get stimulated or hyped up and be braver. For example, when calling for bills and stuffs; or maybe asking stangers for directions. Ahh, whatever.

People with confidence certainly shine more than people like me. Their charms. I admire those who are brave and confident. People will certainly take more glance on those with confidence rather than some peanut like me. Ugh, sad thing.

Trying hard. I need help and guidance. I need supports and motivation.

Sigh, I need more confidence..




That's all for now, bye.